In the late 90’s, at the height of their Saturday morning television fame, Ant and Dec had a game on their show called Wonky Donkey. The aim of the game was to guess what the animal was on the screen in front of you. The twist was that the animal would be altered in some way to ensure that it’s descriptive or complimentary element rhymed with the animal name.
For example, a three legged donkey, which Ant or Dec would wobble on the screen, would be a “Wonky Donkey”.
This theme was taken and used at friends very successful house party about 8 years ago. Entrance to the party was only allowed if you brought your own adult-themed ‘Wonky Donkey’. I took a toy monkey wrapped in black electrical tape with a cherry tomato in it’s mouth (Gimp Chimp), and there were many many other excellent entrants to the competition.
And now the party is being revived. This Saturday, another house party will take place with the theme Wonkey Donkey EXPLICIT.
This is where you come in. I am looking for the rudest, most explicit, most bad taste wonky donkey you can think of, as I only have a few days to source the materials to make it.
To give you a hint, some previous entrants were:
- Swine 69
- Necrophile Crocodile
- Spunky Monkey
- Arse-bead Centipede
You get the idea. So come on Internet peeps, show me just how clever and creative you all are…
No tags
barnsley sime · April 20, 2009 at 11:53 am
mole in your hole?
crotchless pant ant?
armadildo?
i’ll have a think at work tonight.
barnsley sime · April 20, 2009 at 12:01 pm
ooh ooh!
spunk skunk!
laod up a toad
intercourse horse
spit or “swallow”
(can’t think of owt rhyming with cunt yet)
welshrocker01 · April 20, 2009 at 1:05 pm
fuck duck
beaver receiver
Doug · April 20, 2009 at 2:06 pm
At the risk of being obvious:
Scat cat
And one that might require some explanation:
Cleveland Steamer Lemur
KT · April 20, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Do we get a picture of the chosen creation?
Gang bang orang-utan
Pussy juice moose
Deep throat stoat
Tit wank fish tank
You’re going to get a lot more google freaks after this I fear!
Jaggy · April 20, 2009 at 3:14 pm
Tadger Badger
Limp chimp
Cludgie Budgie
Shitty Kitty
Admin comment by Mr Angry · April 20, 2009 at 5:22 pm
These are all really good. Particularly like Gang-bang orang-utan! (But I would have to buy several
And yes, I will provide photographic evidence of my creation – and probably a few others too…
Dungeekin · April 20, 2009 at 5:25 pm
How about:
Gaping Goat?
I’m sure regular net-browsers will know to what I refer…
(and no, I’m not linking).
Dungeekin
sooz · April 20, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Being of naive and somewhat chaste and pure of mind, I can’t think of anything but found the ‘armadildo’ hilarious! (what ARE you all saying??? *off to google*)
sooz · April 20, 2009 at 6:13 pm
(without the extra ‘of’ obv… *sigh*)
sam · April 20, 2009 at 7:29 pm
Shag Stag
Buggery Budgery
Faggot Maggot
Sperm Worm
Blackbird Turd
Love Juice Goose
Masturbator Alligator
Rape Ape
Twat Gnat
Butt Pound Hound
Sperm Blizzard Lizard
Wood PECKER
(all with the help of my 14 year old son Richard who explained what a Cleveland Steamer Lemur was – why am I not surprised!!!!)
Brennig Jones · April 21, 2009 at 6:38 am
Borrow Cliff’s dog – Butt Plug Pug!
JonnyB · April 21, 2009 at 9:13 am
CBTBee
hmmm · April 21, 2009 at 11:28 am
scabby whore labrador
Admin comment by Mr Angry · April 21, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Thank you everybody – there are some excellent suggestions in there.
I am not sure what a Bee learning to ride a motorbike is doing in there though JonnyB?
Johnnie · April 21, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Just a twist on Dungeekin, but I think that Goatse Goaty has a certain ring to it.
barnsley sime · April 21, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Ok..you wanted bad taste? how about..
Rusty sheriffs badger
Shaved twat cat
Cunt juice moose? (Yay me… Managed it)
Pubic lice mice
Cock ring ling
Anal rape ape
Felching lemming
(Its 2pm and I should be asleep. Hope you appreciate that)
Have we had deep throat stoat?
barnsley sime · April 21, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Ok…this is my best in my opinion.
Autoerotic asphyxiation alsation.
ttfn
gnarlyswine · April 21, 2009 at 6:58 pm
fornication dalmatian?
gnarlyswine · April 21, 2009 at 7:00 pm
raper tapir
gnarlyswine · April 21, 2009 at 7:10 pm
Ku Klux Klan Orang-utan
and its a bit of a stretch
Auschwitz Ostrich
either of those should be a sure fire party stopper.
barnsley sime · April 22, 2009 at 11:21 am
“Auschwitz Ostrich”
“Ku Klux Klan Orang-utan”
now theres funny!
and a mention on the podcast! that’ll do for me.
Scaryduck · April 22, 2009 at 11:31 am
Sime: As any viewer of The Simpsons knows, it’s “Ku Klux Clam”
JonnyB · April 22, 2009 at 11:43 am
John Warboys Tortoise
JonnyB · April 22, 2009 at 4:34 pm
NB of course you have to pronounce ‘tortoise’ as ‘tor-toyce’ as many people do.
I’ve been worrying about this all afternoon.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · April 22, 2009 at 5:27 pm
JonnyB – This is a problem. My roots are in the midlands which means I am inclined to pronounce totoise as if it had a ‘z’ in it.
I suppose I could just do the same with John Warboys?
Jax · April 22, 2009 at 11:53 pm
Eager Beaver
Cock block
Shrimp Pimp
Eatyalater Alligator
Boar Whore
Cat Scat
Sharkfin Blumpkin
Bony Pony
Abuck Duck
Yak Wack
Not rhyming but offensive and involving animals:
Donkey Punch
Hood Rat
Goatsie
MrJolly · April 23, 2009 at 1:39 pm
Hard-sports horse
Phil · April 23, 2009 at 8:31 pm
Fuck duck
Admin comment by Mr Angry · April 24, 2009 at 11:57 am
Thank you all for your excellent suggestions. I have made my choice and it is one that you came up with.
I will post a photo over the weekend. When I have bought it, and ‘dressed’ it.
gnarlyswine · April 27, 2009 at 4:39 pm
come on then – where is it.
Hange Me Out To Dry · May 1, 2009 at 6:28 pm
which did you pick? where is the pic?