It is now over seven years since the terrible events of September 11th 2001 (I say terrible, but I do not know if any Al Qaeda sympathisers read this site).
A lot can happen in seven years. Fortunes can be won and lost, careers made and then ruined. Or, you can choose to hide in a cave for that entire time. You see, it has been seven years since we have had a genuine confirmed sighting of Osama Bin Laden by anyone other than his close allies.
By happy coincidence, someone can be declared dead in absentia after they have been missing for seven years. Now, I am not telling G Dubbya how to do his job, he has lots of other poorly-qualified people to do that, but if I was him I would look to claim a quick points victory in the run-up to the election.
OK, he might not have Osama’s head on a stick to parade in front of the world’s media, but a death certificate with Osama’s name on it would make a nice photo call in front of the White House. He might as well use the rules to his advantage, he has made enough of them.
“Osama is dead!” he would proclaim from the White House steps.
“Show us his cold dead eyes then!” would be the cry from the hordes of press.
“I don’t need to! I have a piece of paper here showing that he has definitely and properly died to death according to the legal laws of the land. Fact!”
You never know, it might even tempt Osama out of hiding and into the clutches of an eager Secret Service. Or he might just show up in his next video wearing a “Vote McCain!” t-shirt just to spite him.
al qaeda · george w bush · osama bin laden
Keef · October 3, 2008 at 10:22 am
I don’t think Osama would vote for McCain, McCain has a female running mate and I’m sure Osama believes that a woman’s place is in the home barefoot and pregnant, running for VP is probably pushing the envelope a bit.
She’s hot too, America gets Sarah Palin, Ukraine gets Julia Tymshenko and France gets
Mdme Sarkozy, we get Anne Widdecombe, Ruth Kelly and Tessa Jowell ? seriously WTF is wrong with this picture ?
Beside Osama isn’t dead or hiding in Pakistan, he is in fact running my local kebab shop along with his partners Lord Lucan and Elvis Presley
gnarlyswine · October 3, 2008 at 1:41 pm
And as Sarah Palin so astutely pointed out on last nights televised debate when asked about when it would be appropriate to push the red button – Hocky , Hocky , Hocky, Isnt America Terrific!
God help us all.
Keef · October 3, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Gnarlyswine I’m merely passing comment on the fact that she is Hot whereas most female UK politicos are old boots not whether or not she would make a good prez or vice-prez
I don’t consider physical attractiveness a rational criteria for picking a national leader.
Like most folks back here in the Mother Country I’m hoping that our Colonial cousins across the Pond are not as dumb as the media paint them and don’t elect her and John ‘I was a prisoner in Nam for 5 years’ McCain
I wouldn’t turn her down were she to throw herself at me but I sure as hell wouldn’t vote for her but then being a Brit I don’t get a vote either way.
Sewmouse · October 3, 2008 at 5:03 pm
GWB would never show you just a piece of paper. He has made his feelings well known on his respect for things on paper – why, he even refers to the Constitution of the United States as “just a goddamn piece of paper”.
ubermouth · October 4, 2008 at 6:17 pm
OR, if the funeral was lavish enough, he might just come disguised as amourner/rejoicer and be nabbed!
When the mountain won’t come to Mohammed!
Your comments don’t always get through- I try, but do not succeed, nearly every day.
ubermouth · October 4, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Damn, had I known that comment would have made the lottery, I would have been far more abusive.:)
Love you/love your blog.
ubermouth · October 4, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Bush referred to the Constitution as ‘ just a goddamn piece of paper’?
And he wasn’t even assassinated?
I am livid » Advising Al Qaeda · October 15, 2008 at 7:32 am
[...] week’s post advising George W. Bush to use the law to his advantage got me thinking, and as a result I do have another tip for Al Qaeda – [...]