Name calling is juvenile and immature. Unless it is not aimed at me and really funny, in which case it is both big, and clever.
What I do not understand is fat people calling other fat people ‘fatty’, or retards calling other stupid people ‘dumbass’, or even black people calling other black people ‘nigger’. I just do not get it?
Isn’t the point of name calling to make yourself appear better than the other person?
I could just about accept “You average-looking twat” from Brad Pitt, just. Or maybe a “Hey thicko!” from Professor Stephen Hawkins, though I am not sure he is able to actually shout with that pretentious fake American accent he uses. Other than that, I simply will not tolerate it.
Which is why I take umbrage when being told that I drink ‘like a girl’.
There is nothing wrong with taking your time to enjoy your pint of Guinness. It is not a race. Unless, you know, it actually is a race. In which case, isn’t it the taking part that is important? I do not want to be one of the nations binge-drinkers. During the week.
“Fucking hell Angry, it’s like being in a round with a woman!”
This is a ridiculous argument as everyone knows that women do not drink Guinness, and I was wearing boy clothes. So in fact, it was them that looked like the idiot.
So, I want to know how long you think it should take to complete a pint of Guinness, as there is nothing like using comprehensive statistical analysis when you are accused of drinking like a girl.
No tags
Al · October 29, 2007 at 8:00 am
It is only girly if you drink it through a straw!
randomclick · October 29, 2007 at 9:47 am
I bet you drink with your little pinky finger sticking out don’t you
Oli · October 29, 2007 at 9:48 am
You are indeed a big girl, the correct speed to drink any pint is at that of the fastest drinker in the round.
Dr_Clip · October 29, 2007 at 10:18 am
Hmmm, depends which hand the pint was in?
z · October 29, 2007 at 10:19 am
You’re not a bit like a girl, Angry. Though whatever makes you think that being told you are is an insult?
Pentheus · October 29, 2007 at 10:51 am
No, Angry, I’m sure you don’t drink like a girl. That is unless you enjoy those sugary cocktails that taste like fruit juice and cost a tenner a pop.
Glammer · October 29, 2007 at 11:51 am
You are clearly not a girl. You are a big gayer whining about not getting a round in because you’re nursing your pint to death. I bet you put George Michael on the jukebox when nobody’s looking.
Oli · October 29, 2007 at 11:52 am
Spot the english
“ベトナムアイドル ホアン・トゥイ・リンさん（19）sexテープ流出で芸能界引退【動画アリ】…
ニュースより抜粋〜 【ベトナム】ベトナムの若手人気女優、ホアン・トゥイ・リンさん……”
TheBoy · October 29, 2007 at 1:06 pm
Guiness is a big boy drink, unless its been prescribed because your pregnant. Something you’re not telling us Angry?
gnarlyswine · October 29, 2007 at 1:23 pm
#^*&_(*&!$$#@)(_*)(
!&^*(*_(+)+__()!!!!!!!!
A pint of guiness should take about 5 seconds as its less Gaseous, you then have more of the evening to spend throwing up.
xl · October 29, 2007 at 1:50 pm
Guinness — very manly.
Are you not telling us something, like your evening included tropical drinks with pineapple slices and little pastel paper umbrellas?
Megan · October 29, 2007 at 1:58 pm
Please! Having boobs does not mean a default liking for sugary drinks with ridiculous accessories that a. poke you in the eye if you foolishly try to drink around them and b. take up valuable room in the glass that could be filled with alcohol. Honestly…
Duck · October 29, 2007 at 2:53 pm
Speaking as an Guinness drinker:
http://pictureofaduck.blogspot.com/2007/10/secret-of-happiness-part-ii.html
It’s always the speed of the fastest drinker in the round – although you are allowed to get a Ken Barlow (a half pint) if you’re struggling, but only once during the evening.
And girls are known to get to double figures in Guinness, so drinking like a girl could be a compliment
Duck · October 29, 2007 at 2:56 pm
And if we’re being scientific, the time it takes varies depending on whether it’s the first or the 9th of the evening – usually somwwhere between 14 and 21 minutes.
Oli · October 29, 2007 at 3:45 pm
We always called a half a girls gulp up untill a few years ago when it became a living ronnie.
Peach · October 29, 2007 at 5:03 pm
I agree with comment 7
bendersbetterbrother · October 29, 2007 at 5:07 pm
All depends, Angry.
The first pint of black takes about 3 minutes. The second about 10 minutes and so on maxing out at about 20 to 30 minutes by the end of the night (except for the 2 which you got at last orders which will have to be drunk in about 40 seconds each or left at the bar).
Also, as everyone knows Guinness has the same atomic weight as Polonium as is twice as toxic. What are these name callers drinking? Don’t tell, Lager or Git-ter?
Admin comment by Mr Angry · October 29, 2007 at 5:10 pm
Megan – Fat Jim will be delighted that his man boobs have no influence on his choice of colourful cocktail.
Benders brother – Thank you, at last a sensible response. And yes, the majority of them drink lager. And some of them only by the Bottle!!!
GH · October 29, 2007 at 5:10 pm
Its simple Mr A, don’t be the last bloke still holding a pint. And if its guinness don’t add anything non-alcoholic (like blackcurrant which is for poofs and girls)
GH
Tideliar · October 29, 2007 at 6:26 pm
My girlfriend, who is actually a real girl, drinks Guinness. She has been known to knock em back hard and fast (the Guinness), or sometimes drink them a bit slower. Unfortunately, they go a bit warm and flatter (still the Guinness) if left out too long. So, the right speed is not girlie, it’s fast enough that you beat my girlfriend (again, with the Guinness), but not so long that you like one of The Gays sitting with a half of warm, flat Guinness.
Obviously.
Sam · October 29, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Light Weight!
Jo · October 29, 2007 at 8:53 pm
The men at my local who drink Guinness are the ones with permanent seats at the end of the bar, biding their time before they have to head home to their 60 year old wives. What’s your excuse? And don’t try and tell me you like the taste.
melanie · October 30, 2007 at 12:55 am
girls may not drink guinness, but women do. I do. And I drink it slowly. Savor it.
Unless of course its an Irish car bomb (shot of whiskey and irish creme dropped into a half pint of guinness) then you have to slam it. and you don’t walk to far after a few of those.
Peach · October 30, 2007 at 11:41 am
NO! Now you’ve changed comment 7 – I now agree with comment 8
GH · October 30, 2007 at 5:32 pm
Am loving the sound of the Irish carbomb, one for the next time the rugby rolls around….probably against Ireland…in a plastic paddy pub!
GH