In parts of the media there has been uproar about the possibility of raising the retirement age beyond 65. Yet now, when a 66 year-old man decides it is time to call it a day, it is also considered newsworthy. I wish they would make up their minds.

I am not particularly interested in Sir Menzies Campbell, but find amusing the amount of media attention his resignation has created.

As I watched the drama unfold on Sky news the other evening, I saw party chairman Simon Hughes being asked repeatedly, “Did you wield the knife? DID YOU WIELD THE KNIFE!”

There is nothing quite like sexing-up a boring old resignation, is there?

I would have loved Simon Hughes to have come back out to the baying hordes and said, “Actually no. There were no daggers involved. That would be barbaric. As a forward thinking party we advocate the use of technology, and I feel it is only right to say that once the electrodes were securely fastened to Ming’s testicles, he was more than compliant. In fact, we are hoping that testicle-electrodes will become a core element in our election manifesto. ASBO’s are dead. Long live the testicle-electrode!”

I would almost vote for them if he were to say that. Almost.

As it is, there are now some calls to bring back Charles Kennedy. Calls which I whole-heartedly agree with. Normally when an alcoholic is ‘outed’ by the media we get the chance to see photos of them stumbling out of a nightclub, or fighting with police, or vomiting outside a kebab shop. With Charles Kennedy, we saw none of this, he merely drifted from view. Which is why I feel cheated.

Give him the job again I say, and give us all the chance to see what entertainment a proper alcoholic can provide given an adequate platform.

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