I quite like going to the gym, as I am well-read and fully understand the benefits of doing so. I try to go a couple of times a week, if I have time, and I have heard that exercise is an excellent way of relieving stress. A bit like having a wank, only without the elaborately planned outfits.

I usually exercise alone, but I accept that there are many weak-willed work-shy slackers out there that need to work out in pairs in order to remain motivated. I do not, however, understand why these guys talk to each other like they’re in the middle of some sadomasochistic ritual.

A couple of nights ago I was plodding away serenely on the treadmill (I am quite the fleet-footed runner in my new trainers), when my concentration on the latest Girls Aloud video was rudely broken.

“Arggggh! Yeah! Feel the burn bro! Two more! Come on!” screamed one bloke to the other who was lying on the exercise bench.

It is a shame that his exercise partner was deaf, but I was pleased to see that they were not letting one small disability prevent them from working out. Honestly, they are an inspiration to us all. I continued running and admiring Mrs. Ashley Cole, but just a few moments later my focus was once again drawn to the free weights area.

“That’s it! Thee! Yes bro! Two! Come on! And one! Excellent bro!” shouted the deaf exerciser.

The other one was obviously deaf too! I suppose this makes sense, as ‘birds of a feather..’ and all that. I must admit to being quietly impressed at their enunciation, better than some fully hearing people I know, and although they sounded a bit chavy for my tastes it was actually very clear. In fact, if they had not been screaming at each other at full volume from less than a foot away, I would not even had known they had a hearing problem at all.

Of course, this did raise the question as to why they did not sign encouragement at each other? But then, I am not sure you can shout in sign language.