Terrorists are getting worse.

John Smeaton is obviously a hero, but I think it is clear that these terrorists are getting worse. Or is it better? What I mean is, the attacks are getting more like an episode of the keystone cops. Whether this is better or worse I guess depends on whether you are reading this in your London home, or in a cave in Afghanistan.

If we look back to 2001, and the world Trade Centre attack, it is clear that the people responsible were well trained, and reasonably bright. Not everyone can learn to fly a plane (though I have always wondered why it did not ring any alarm bells that they did not express any interest in learning how to actually land a passenger jet). I would imagine that these scumbags were the equivalent of the Al Qaeda A-Team.

Then we have our own attack in London two years ago, almost to the day. The best terrorists had clearly gone (the major downside to using suicide bombers, you can not have your cake and eat it). So next up, were those terrorists who could actually use a tube ticket machine, which is less than 20% of the population based on my own personal rush-hour experience. It was not quite flying a plane, but required a reasonable grasp of technology and the ability to read a tube map. Even then, one managed to get on a bus by mistake.

Then we fast forward two years. I can picture the Al Qaeda meeting in a desolate location somewhere in the Middle East.

“OK, we need a team of martyrs who are well versed in nuclear technology, military surveillance, fluent in English, and proficient in all forms of modern firearms. Anyone?”

[Cue much looking at the floor and avoiding of eye contact]

“Right. Plan B. Who thinks they could drive a British Military tank and engage rudimentary missile systems?”

[Further shoe gazing now accompanied by a little background whistling]

“Oh for fucks sake! Who can drive a car and use a box of matches?”

“Oh! OO!! Me ME! Choose me! We can use an automatic, right?”

Honestly, I fully expect the next attack to involve a big paper bag and a loud shout of “Bang!”

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