* Takes off clothes and begins to type *
I have bought a computer games machine!
It is ace, honestly, and really makes the most of my nice newish TV. I was getting a bit bored of just watching digital television and DVDs.
I admit I am a bit crap at the games I got with it, but that will soon change as I am a natural athlete and so it is only a matter of time before I can shoot all challengers in the face (in the games). As part of my quest to become brilliant at it, I have bought a wireless adapter. This means I can play against people on the Interweb! From my own sofa! I can now be ritually humiliated by teenagers from all over the world, but it is especially good as I now have the opportunity to shoot Fat Jim in the face without actually having to go outside and round to his flat.
The problems began when I tried to open the packet the adapter came in. It was one of those plastic heat sealed things that appears to have been forged in fires of hell itself. There was a helpful sign on the back saying “Cut here” with a dotted line across the top. This seems like a straight forward instruction. However, I can only assume they meant add the words “with an acetylene torch”, because it was not opening with my scissors. And I speak as someone who developed a vice-like grip during his lonely teenage years.
When scissors do not work, there is obviously only one option left open to you. You have to fetch the biggest and sharpest knife in the kitchen. Mine is known amongst friends as the “Knife of Woe” on account of the number of times I have cut myself on it. I think technically it might be considered an actual sword. It is massive. And really fucking sharp. When cooking I used to pretend it was a sword, and that I was a musketeer, until the neighbours started giving me funny looks and I realised they could see into my kitchen when I was doing it. Nowadays I make sure I play out my fantasies behind closed blinds.
Anyway, the Knife of Woe did its job and I have but a mere scratch for my troubles. Now I must go and practise so that I can shoot Fat Jim in the face online. But first I will get dressed, otherwise it would be wrong on so very many levels.
* Gets dressed and logs off *
And now for the bit you have all really been waiting for. Picture evidence from today’s post can be found HERE… I have included the blogged-about item, as I felt sure some of you would accuse me of Googling for “man on laptop in the nude” and using a picture from that. But believe me, I do not have time to look through 15 million images.
If you think this photo is worth a vote, then click here and vote Mr Angry on the top right of the page. If you don’t, then leave a comment on the photo abusing me. I think I know which will have the higher hit rate. Still, it does not look like I will come last now, which was the whole point after all…
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45 comments
<< Oops
Mr Farty · June 29, 2007 at 9:12 am
Arrghhh! My eyes! My eyes!
chopski · June 29, 2007 at 9:15 am
You like to take off your clothes then shoot Fat Jim in the face? Each to their own!!
Celeste · June 29, 2007 at 9:16 am
Phwoarrrrrr. Although I do feel slightly wrong fancying a guy with a cartoon head. *frets*
me · June 29, 2007 at 9:32 am
mmmmmmm
Jimmy Page's Trousers · June 29, 2007 at 9:32 am
Eeeeeuuuwww. Leather chair + nudie bloke. Not a good combination. Does it now bear a Turin Shroud-like impression of your arse?
Dominic · June 29, 2007 at 9:48 am
All this time I thought it was just a caricatured cartoon at the top of the page, rather than an actual picture of your face.
Don’t I feel silly now. . .
Mr Angry's Gran · June 29, 2007 at 9:55 am
Who took the photograph ?
M.C. Glammer · June 29, 2007 at 10:17 am
If you subscribe to all the blogs in Big Blogger you can pretty much tell who’s got the biggest regular readership and therefore who is the likeliest to win. I’d do it, but, y’know, I can’t be arsed.
Then again, some bloggists have readers who can’t even be arsed voting. [Holds hands up in *guilty* motion]
Anna · June 29, 2007 at 10:20 am
Pwoaaar indeed – do you have a hairy back too? Please say you do. Here was me thinking you’d be a skinny concave chest type nerd – happily I was wrong.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · June 29, 2007 at 10:27 am
Mr Farty – What about my poor camera!
Chopski – That is an image that will haunt me forever. Thank you.
Celeste – What cartoon head?
me – mmmmmmm?
JPT – Yes, leather sofa plus bare arse is not something I would recommend, but I made a promise…
Dominic – I will bet you are not the only one!
Gran – Camera with a timer. Though a female friend was only too willing to offer her services. I declined…
MC – Are you saying I’ve got a little one?
Anna – Nope, sorry…
bonnie · June 29, 2007 at 10:41 am
Just as I suspected, funny and sexy, phwooaar indeed.
sooz · June 29, 2007 at 10:43 am
Blimey!
Err… I don’t feel right complimenting you on your six pack and your muscular physique when you’re our ‘Mr Angry’
I’m a bit flustered…
Err… nice bannister. (someone get my coat ffs – my legs have gone all wibbly!)
Admin comment by Mr Angry · June 29, 2007 at 10:48 am
bonnie – Hello. I wonder why no-one believed me?
sooz – I painted the bannister myself, thank you!
All – That photo has been viewed 100 times already today, and yet I have gained just FIVE votes. This is very disappointing.
If I am not being clear, I apologise. GO AND VOTE FOR ME!!!
Gish · June 29, 2007 at 11:03 am
lush off to vote
Kelly · June 29, 2007 at 11:11 am
Good call on the photo- your votes have gone through the roof. Might I suggest a Friday hairstyle too?
bob · June 29, 2007 at 11:48 am
Wow. I’d almost vote for that. But ….
Mr.X · June 29, 2007 at 12:42 pm
You expect us to vote for a nude bloke when there are rather nice female, err, attributes on show instead?
Get a grip, man.
On what is your preference.
Although kudos on keeping your word on the picture. We have at least commented on that for you…
Kate · June 29, 2007 at 1:43 pm
Ding Dong!
Admin comment by Mr Angry · June 29, 2007 at 2:11 pm
Gish – Cheers.
Kelly – Hello, unfortunately there has not been much movement SINCE the photo went up…
Bob – You can email Tim and tell him you’ve changed you mind?
Mr X – I must admit I am relying more on the female vote here.
Kate – I think that first D should be a K…
Sewmouse · June 29, 2007 at 2:28 pm
Pwoaaar indeed…
Whew.
I think I’m going to have to go take a little lie-down now and just ponder that image…
I voted before. It won’t let me vote again.
Kate · June 29, 2007 at 2:55 pm
Ha! Now there’s a thought for the train home
S · June 29, 2007 at 3:10 pm
Well well.
I don’t know whether to completiment you on the Six Pack, The Tan, The Bannister or the xbox 360 ariel between your legs.
Staring? me? Never! ;o)
S · June 29, 2007 at 3:11 pm
See…even doing typos!
*should read compliment.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · June 29, 2007 at 4:03 pm
sewmouse – thank you for trying to cheat at least…
Kate – Indeed.
S – Thank you for the complitement!
All – over 220 views of that picture, and yet I have only 165 votes. Some of you are not voting… booo!!
Irish Girl · June 29, 2007 at 4:17 pm
I don’t recognise that body. Are you sure it’s yours? Maybe I need a picture from a different angle.
Curious · June 29, 2007 at 5:04 pm
haha, i like… but i’m not sure exactly who it is that i’m liking… could be “fat jim” for all i know.. but i like. and I VOTED…
*smug smile*
xl · June 29, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Thank you for the modesty panel below the computer.
katie · June 29, 2007 at 8:13 pm
Go on – admit it – you spent 20mins doing situps and pressups before taking that photo didn’t you?
Alan · June 29, 2007 at 9:02 pm
Well, what can I say…. seems like a nice boy **** in best John Inman type voice lol…..
Sam Cullum · June 29, 2007 at 9:03 pm
Cheat – that’s not nude! I want the dangly bits and all – please…..
Anna · June 30, 2007 at 12:59 am
You’re young yet – it’ll grow…trust me
luna · June 30, 2007 at 2:36 am
EEEEWWWW!! I’ll vote for you as soon as you promise a full body wax job.
Come to think of it,the next task IS a fullbody waxjob.
Katy Newton · June 30, 2007 at 11:15 am
Dude. I voted for you. You earned it.
Cliff · June 30, 2007 at 12:53 pm
Jesus Christ, Angry.
I mean, I know weekend traffic isn’t great, but really.
ninja chinchilla · June 30, 2007 at 1:09 pm
Wow!!!!! It’s definitely got my vote. Would have got more if it had allowed me.
Say no to waxing (on guys that is). Something quite disturbing about a man with no bodyhair.
The Girl · June 30, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Luna my dear, if the sight of a man with body hair repulses you so, that’s fine by me (though it’s somewhat insulting to blokes, surely?).
Women like you enable women like me to have better access and less competition for the sexier, more ‘manly’, men. So if you dislike men with fuzz, great: that just means there’s more hot guys out there for me to choose from.
Result.
Anna · June 30, 2007 at 10:11 pm
Got to agree with The Girl. After a hot sexy sesh you don’t stick to hairy guys, with smooth hairless guys you have to painfully unpeel from them.
Give me a fuzzy hair teddy bear anytime.
luna · July 1, 2007 at 12:05 am
Anna, Nina ,Girl & co by all means do, just remember not to take them on a date in Regent’s Park!
Four Dinners · July 1, 2007 at 12:31 am
now if billie piper or patsy kensit announced they were blogging in the nude that would be one thing…..
this is quite another
ex-flatmate · July 1, 2007 at 8:01 pm
wrong wrong wrong
What am I meant to do when I come round for beers now, sit on the bleedin floor?
ninja chinchilla · July 2, 2007 at 7:35 am
Either that or avoid the arse-shaped mark on the sofa.
Katy Newton · July 2, 2007 at 8:58 am
Goodness. I think that Mr A has a nice normal healthy amount of man hair. But then I would always choose a hairy man over a non-hairy man. Each to their own.
luna · July 3, 2007 at 12:47 am
Girl, do you wax? Why ?
rivergirlie · July 5, 2007 at 5:20 pm
i can clearly see you’re nuts
(that works better if you read it out loud)
la cubana gringa · July 12, 2007 at 5:19 pm
I’m a bit sad that I was a tad distracted by turning twenty-ten to pop in on this day…
Better late than never, I suppose!
Props to you, Mr. Angry, for being a hairy man of your word!