There was a great deal of media coverage last week of the Gambian President, Yahya Jammeh, and his claim that he can cure HIV and Aids.
Apparently he has invented a sort of herbal remedy, which when mixed with his mystical powers, will cure people within days.
Fortunately for us though, he has not let this power go to his head. In fact he is behaving much like any health professional you could visit in the UK, in that if you try and make an appointment you are told he only does Aids on Mondays and Thursdays. Fridays and Saturdays are reserved for curing Asthma. The rest of the week he focuses on running the country. I do not know if he has a day off.
I am however, appalled. The selfish fucker has completely ignored Man-flu. As someone who has recently suffered, I feel it is more than deserving of a cure from such a gifted individual. I personally would have paid over a tenner for a cure. He could make a fortune!
Unfortunately, I have my suspicions on whether he actually can cure Aids, or not. Which is is a shame, if you happen to have it and live in Gambia. When watching him on TV it is like looking at a child who has been caught in a lie. I would imagine his claims were not meant to leave the Gambia, and were mainly to solidify his position of popularity, but now the world has found out, and we want to know more.
There was a brief interview on Sky the other day where his paraphrased response to the the demand for evidence from around the world was, “I don’t need to provide evidence, you can see people cured all around you, you just need to believe it.”
That is like saying, “Iraq has weapons of mass destruction that could be launched at us within 30 minutes, we know they are there, you just need to believe us”.
No-one would fall for that, surely?
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greavsie · February 26, 2007 at 8:12 am
How do you get 150,000 American soldiers in a phone box?
Tell them it’s a missile launcher.
greavsie · February 26, 2007 at 8:33 am
And of course I now have to inform you that was not my joke but that of my eldest.
marycub · February 26, 2007 at 8:42 am
That’s the problem with such a colossal lie, it’s bound to be found out eventually. Now if he’d claimed he could cure man-flu, the chances are the claim would have never left his country! So you’d still suffer.
Jimmy Page's Trousers · February 26, 2007 at 8:49 am
Miracle cures? What of my melancholia? Can that be excised so easily? Will that be driven off by the application of some sort of pasty substance and a cup of hot bark tea? I fear not. I fear that my wistfulness is beyond even the talents of such a man as Jammeh. Alas, my low spirits must abide.
I’m also a bit gassy.
S Hamilton · February 26, 2007 at 10:02 am
I am scandalised that anyone would cast aspersions on President Alhaji Dr. Yahya Abdul-Azziz Jemus Junkung Jammeh, Commander In Chief of The Armed Forces and the Chief Custodian of the Sacred Constitution of The Gambia.
After all, he is leader of my current favourite name for a political party, the Alliance for Patriotic Reorientation and Construction, something which you just have to be in favour of. Or else.
And according to his own website;
“Jammeh’s Aids cure real …Sky News is wrong”
Now if there’s one thing you can be certain of, it’s Sky News being wrong, so I’m with Jammeh on this one.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · February 26, 2007 at 12:57 pm
greavsie – your eldest what?
marycub – if he’d claimed a cure for man-flu I’d have been looking on Google for Gambian flights.
JPT’s – Err, eat more fibre?
S Hamilton – It is an impressive title, about the only thing impressive about the man really.
steve_p · February 26, 2007 at 2:11 pm
My opinion is if you read it on the internet it is true, same as if you read it in the paper it is true. Maybe I am being naive?
Dr_Clip · February 26, 2007 at 2:22 pm
I have a preventative cure.
Stay well away from infected blood, dont have sex with people who have it.
This isnt my field of expertise but I think that just about covers it.
Betty · February 26, 2007 at 4:10 pm
Herbal remedy?
I bet it’s berocca.
I tried to tell you all.
Oli · February 26, 2007 at 4:24 pm
There was a guy who claimed he could cure breast cancer, im surpriseda few ladies fell for that one, apparently he had quite a following.
fatman · February 26, 2007 at 5:00 pm
It’s sad that a man who has reached the highest position his nation can offer still feels the need to impress. Maybe he has very hard to please parents.
“I’ve been elected President Dad!”
“I heard. It wasn’t unanimous though was it!”
“No…but… I can cure AIDS.”
Poor man.
Four Dinners · February 26, 2007 at 7:10 pm
The highest position in most African states isn’t some’at to shout about. They’ve all butchered thousands by the time they get there. Dunno why Jammy thingy would claim that but, then again, who knows why Idi kept heads in his fridge. It’s an African thing.
Badger · February 26, 2007 at 7:24 pm
I am actually beginning to lose count of the amount of African despots there have been in the past decade or so. Nelson Mandela was a bad one, if I recall correctly. Him and his mad wife.
I am actually working on a cure for AIDS right now. It involves necking two packs of Polos (Original flavour), followed by 16 cans of Strongbow and a street fight.
…
Well, it’s more of a placebo.
B.
maggie · February 26, 2007 at 8:37 pm
my bf has been suffering from man-flu for god-knows-how-long, Angry.
maybe you guys need to get out of UK for that.
i agree on dr clip’s suggestion but although it would really be hard for people asking for a medical statement from shag partners before having a go at it.
steve_p · February 26, 2007 at 9:02 pm
The UK strain of “man-flu” is renowned. There is no cure, just got to ride it out.
Farty · February 26, 2007 at 9:18 pm
I think he’s playing at oneupmanship with the South African Health Minister Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, aka Dr Beetroot.
http://www.mg.co.za/articlePage.aspx?articleid=280903&area=/breaking_news/breaking_news__national/
You couldn’t make it up. Well, you could, but who would believe you?
fatman · February 26, 2007 at 11:28 pm
I’d say that for those living in Africa reaching the highest position would be “some’at to shout about.” What with all the perks that come with the despotic leader badge!
Student of Life · February 27, 2007 at 4:12 am
This is a bit of a tangent, but what the hell. On the subject of Iraq and weapons of mass destruction, I saw a great bumper sticker the other day. It read: “Nobody died when Clinton lied.” Even though I think Bill Clinton is also a schmuck, this bumper sticker very simply put things into perspective. I wanted to drive by the car honking in agreement, but in this area, that shit could get you shot.