Have you ever photocopied your arse?

I haven’t, in case you thought that was where this post was going.

I don’t actually think it is possible to photocopy your arse. From a practical standpoint, I mean. Photocopiers these days have a myriad of complicated options, other than simply pressing the Copy button, so a simple copying procedure is no longer the ‘norm’. Multifunction devices today have more options than a modern Space Shuttle and the menu’s are hard enough to decipher the right way up, never mind upside down if you are sat with your bare arse on the glass. Rather than simply copy your arse, you could just as easily email it to the entire office.

And what about greyscale or colour? If the technology is available why not use it? Or maybe you have a bottom based blemish you would rather not share in full Technicolour. And what about the re-sizing options? I know a number of women who would jump at the chance to use that feature.

“Here Angry, look, I photocopied my arse!”

“No you didn’t. This arse looks like it belongs to Kate Moss, yet yours would be more at home on the back of a Rhino.”

Then there is the process of actually getting up onto the photocopier. With your pants around your ankles. Anyone who has tried to get anywhere in a hurry with their pants around their ankles will know that this not an easy thing to do. Which suggests you would have to take your trousers off completely, eliminating the quick getaway and the possibility of getting them back on if you heard someone coming.

So, with all that said, have you ever photocopied your arse?

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