There is a knock on the door.
“Hello, you don’t know me, but your great great great great grandfather both picked on, and was thoroughly mean to my great great great great grandfather. He may also have been responsible for his untimely death.”
“Oh. Really? I didn’t know that.”
“Yes. He was.”
“That is a shock. How unfortunate, and a little embarrassing for me if the truth be told.”
“Indeed it is. I would like to know what you are going to do about it?”
“Do about it?”
“Yes, I feel that I am owed some monetary compensation for the behaviour of your great great great great grandfather, and I expect you to pay up.”
“Really? That seems a little unfair. I never knew my great great great great grandfather, in fact he sounds like a bit of an arse, but if you think I’m about to offer you compensation for his behaviour, then you are sorely mistaken.”
“If you were really sorry you would throw lots of money at me right now.”
This is an unusual conversation, I’m sure you’d agree? Yet this is essentially what the Pan African Reparation Coalition are asking for after hearing of Tony Blair’s ’sorrow’ over Britain’s history in the slave trade.
Is the history of the slave trade – and our country’s involvement in it – something to be ashamed of? Absolutely. The thought of something like this happening in this day and age is totally abhorrent. It is a shameful episode in our country’s history, but ultimately that is what it is, history. The people who directly suffered are no longer with us. The people who directly perpetrated these crimes against humanity are no longer with us.
So why then, do these distant descendants deserve monetary compensation? Frankly, they do not.
I am not responsible for the behaviour of people who lived 200 years ago.
There is a whole can of worms waiting to be opened if they are given any compensation whatsoever. Trust me when I say that if one single penny of my tax revenue goes towards that organisation, and in doing so denies the NHS or other vital public services necessary funds, then someone is going to get seriously hurt.
It happened, and it was truly terrible, but the people who are to blame are long gone. Get over it.
No tags
billyboy · November 29, 2006 at 8:23 am
The worlds gone bloody mad. If you apply the logic attached to these ancient cases, there may be a case for compensation for relatives of some long dead slave trader, because some poor soul had the audacity to die in transit, thus causing said merchant to suffer financial loss.
Learn from history and move on so we can avoid making the same mistakes. These people make me bloody cross.
piersy · November 29, 2006 at 8:50 am
Making the same mistakes, by maintaing poverty in perpetuity in Africa through loans with terrible tie-ins to ‘globalisation’ treaties whereby we rape them of their resources and dump our cheap goods on them, while forcing them to spend what little money they do have on our weapons and allowing in our oil and mining companies who bring in foriegn workers from the west (experts) or south/s east asia (minkeys).
Or encouraging slave labour in china and india by outsourcing our industrial and textile production, wringing our hands in guilt at the injustice of it all then buying £1.99 t-shirts down pundstretcher.
Learning from those mistakes?
Although on the actual point made in the post, totally agreed!
Oli · November 29, 2006 at 8:52 am
Totaly agree, tony blair is so much of a kiss ass that we might end up paying though, just like we are now paying for the french farms and italian hospitals now since lets face it, They must not teach bargaining at the privates chools.
African residents have a long history of trying to rip us off in anyway possible, its applauded over there, and this is just another attempt at geting at our money, dont get me wrong I dont want people to starve, but the people who get our money are rarely the starving ones.
MooMoo · November 29, 2006 at 9:19 am
Your rants really do turn me on………
Dr J · November 29, 2006 at 9:31 am
Buon giorno, is that the Italian Embassy?
Good. I’d like to talk to you about my ancestors. I’m sure they must have suffered terribly during the roman occupation.
Yes I imagine a great many of them were enslaved what with me having ancestors from a number of celtic tribes, and even amongst the Helvetii.
No I wouldn’t be surprised if several met untimely ends in the arena or down salt mines….
So lets talk cash shall we.
They even invented the term for it.
Reductio ad absurdem.
Well done Angry. Fight the Power!
Dr_Clip · November 29, 2006 at 9:46 am
Dear Tony,
Having strawberry blonde hair, I am positive I am from viking decent, this certainly aligns with my powerful athletic figure.
When my ancestors invading you country, raping and pillaging, I feel that when some of my ancestors were captured they had to go through some awful prison conditions / beheading, public stoning / tarred an feathered, that sort of thing.
Anyway, I hereby demand some money from Tony for mis-tratement of my elders whilst captured in ye olde viking days.
Regards
Dr Clip
Alan · November 29, 2006 at 9:57 am
Taken to far, could the USA be sued by the American Indians for the return of lands? What about the good old Abbo in Aus, could they gain compensation… Not a feking chance.. So why is it always at us the bleeding heart liberals seem to aims their beggin bowls…..if Tony pay’s I shall have to seriously consider naming him c**t of the week….
TG · November 29, 2006 at 10:22 am
Tss, I think it’s crystal clear that the Pan African Reparation Coalition is just a front organisation for the BNP.
Let’s just look at what they’re asking for: the PARC basically wants the government to undo the shipping of black people from Africa to Great Britain, the BNP on the other hand, wants, well, exactly the same thing.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · November 29, 2006 at 10:28 am
Billyboy – ‘Cross’ doesn’t cover half of it.
Piercy – Hello. Those things are happening today, the people responsible can therefore be held accountable. Not so with the slave traders… unfortunately!
Oli – I’m not sure this organisation has anything to do with starving people in Africa, does it? It just reeks of extortion to me.
Moomoo – Hello. I get that a lot.
Dr J – Excellent!
Dr Clip – That is good to.
Alan – You too!
Everyone, please keep these ideas coming, I want to hear of more cases where you think you are due some reparation money.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · November 29, 2006 at 10:31 am
TG – Hello, and excellent point on your debut comment. See everyone, you don’t have to make knob and bum jokes to get your point across.
(It does sometimes help though)
f:lux · November 29, 2006 at 10:47 am
Perhaps Blair is trying to set a precedent? You know, if he apologises now for something that happened 200 years ago, when his offspring accede to the throne in 2207 they will merely have to say sorry for Great Great Great Great Grandaddy Tony doing bugger all about human trafficking etc at present?
BoyOnTop · November 29, 2006 at 10:53 am
Under this logic we could go after the Germans for further war reparations given they got the Marshall plan and the UK got to pay off big debts to the US so that the US could pay for the Marshall plan.
PB Curtis · November 29, 2006 at 11:18 am
My ancestors were slaughtered by English troops at Culloden, so the Government, or The Queen owes me money.
Actually, my ancestors were late for the Battle of Culloden, and ran away when they saw what was going on. So the government owes me money for the shame.
piersy · November 29, 2006 at 11:58 am
Mr Angry.
Again I’m in complete agreement with you, and I’d like to think that they are eventually held to account, I still dream of the spanish judiciary indicting blair for war crimes a la pinochet and olmert.
It was was just knee-jerk reacting to the flippancy with which billyboy suggested we had learnt from our mistakes.
Btw stumbled upon your brant(?) (webrant?) a couple of days ago; enjoying immensely!
Admin comment by Mr Angry · November 29, 2006 at 12:35 pm
f:lux – I have this awful feeling he will still be alive and well in 2207…
BoT – The difference being they would tell us where to go…
PBC – Do not worry, no-one reads this shite so the fact that you come from a long line of cowards will remain our little secret.
piersy – ‘brant’? Could be catchy I suppose…
greavsie · November 29, 2006 at 12:49 pm
Brilliant idea. I think the family of the German machine gunner who shot off my Grandfather’s leg during the first world war should pay me compensation. That’s because if he had two legs I wouldn’t have tripped over the false one in the bathroom one night when I was small thereby causing me severe emotional trauma.
La Cubana Gringa · November 29, 2006 at 2:53 pm
Oooooh! Reparation! I’ll take some! My great great great great Grandfather shacked up with one of the African slaves that the Spaniards brought over to Cuba…and I hold her directly responsible for the fact that my arse is too big, thus forcing me to spend more money on tailored pants, brazilian jeans (more spandex), etc. Not to mention the emotional trauma I suffer everytime I shop. I’ll take a check (made out to La Cubana Gringa) or gift certificates…
Ldbug · November 29, 2006 at 3:45 pm
They’ve been at that for awhile here. What I think is even worse, is that just because of the color of my skin I should pay! Um, NO.
Ldbug · November 29, 2006 at 3:49 pm
Oh, and as a woman, I feel I am owed by all men for the mistreatment of my gender throughout all of history. Yup, pay up boys. I think that amounts to something like…Ok, 100 multiplied by 12 subtracted by 26 carry the…
Bluesoup · November 29, 2006 at 3:52 pm
Precisely.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · November 29, 2006 at 4:05 pm
greavsie – what if they just gave him a new leg?
La cubanawhatsit – Big bums can be nice. Just look at that J-Lo woman.
Ldbug – I do not think it is racist issue here. It is not the colour of the skin that matters, just the colour of your money.
Bluesoup – Indeed!
clarissa · November 29, 2006 at 5:40 pm
Ldbug does have a point though. I want compensation for the differential of my salary with that of my male counterparts. Of course, if any of my male counterparts have gotten paid less than me, then all deals are off. Also, I’m not having babies, but I am planning on getting a pet. I want peternity leave.
It’s the Xmas season that’s gotten hold of us greedy buggers.
Wait, I’m not a bugger. I might be greedy.
Doris · November 29, 2006 at 6:34 pm
But didn’t certain Africans supply traders with slaves from within their own societies or from conquered or neighbouring tribes? Will their descendants be asked to apologise and hand over some dosh?
Paul · November 29, 2006 at 7:04 pm
Doris, yes ! These whining greedy barstewards should be given a two word response, the second of which is “off”.
Hacked off .... · November 29, 2006 at 7:06 pm
Actually, you are wrong. I’m all in favour of paying them reparations for slavery.
There is *one* requirement, however.
They have to go back to the part of Africa they came from (East Africa, Gulf of Benin countries, Zaire).
And stay there.
If they come back they have to pay all the money back. With interest.
Ldbug · November 29, 2006 at 7:35 pm
Oooooo I want peternity leave tooo!! Perfect idea Clarissa!
blondie · November 29, 2006 at 7:40 pm
Fun fact: First Nations peoples (Native Americans) do sue governments. All the time. They win, too, which sucks because that’s more money out of taxpayers’ pockets. That wouldn’t even be so bad if there wasn’t rampant misuse of the money and embezzlement, etc. Yay. Go North America.
Not that it bothers me. I miss Europe.
Admin comment by Mr Angry · November 29, 2006 at 10:43 pm
Clarissa – Peternity leave, what a very good idea. So long as it’s not for cats. I hate cats.
Doris – Good point, I’d love one of the ancestors of a campaigner to have been involved…
Paul – Hello. It is OK. You are allowed to swear.
Hacked off – You’re not Nick Griffin are you?
Ldbug – Can I have Blog-leave then?
blondie – Hello. Nothing that happens in America surprises me. Nothing at all.
Equine Pimp · November 29, 2006 at 10:47 pm
Angry I doff my cap in your general direction (well, I would if I wore one)
An excellent rant. If I were a school teacher marking your work I would have to go with – a well written piece demonstrating great care and consideration about the subject matter.
Fortunately (for the youth of today), I am not a school teacher so a hearty “Come On” and “f’kin av it” will have to suffice
Ldbug · November 30, 2006 at 4:38 am
Absolutely;-)