Comments on: Job satisfaction

By: karilyn

karilyn — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 22:12:56 +0000

i learned at my first job at 11 never choose a job because of the title lenght but the money
show me the money!

By: karilyn

karilyn — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 22:10:08 +0000

the longer the job title the crapper the job.

a few years ago i worked for this company and everyone had long and convoluted job titles:
assistant enviornmental and horticultural technican (12 year old boy who mowed the grass)

my title was an assistant accomation services technican (a 11 year old bedmaker)

accomation and services engineer (the cleaner who ordered me to make beds)

but in truth give any one a title and they will work their bollax off

By: the lorider

the lorider — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 20:21:48 +0000

my co. seems to take the opposite view: they give me a lesser-ranking job title in order to justify paying me so little…….

By: Oli

Oli — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 07:50:39 +0000

Mary mary mary…

Sales Executive – all over

Style Management Advisor – Top shop or similar

Floor Manager – Folding clothes in various stores no actual management involved.

Retail Executive

Retail Advisor

Cashier Executive Operative – Made me chuckle, CEO behind a till

By: draco the tyranical

draco the tyranical — Mon, 31 Jul 2006 20:35:27 +0000

Whichever way you look at it, it’s all bollocks. Optical Furnishing Engineer – Window Cleaner no less!

It’s amazing how many people are called “manager” today even if most of them couldn’t manage to tie their own shoe laces. In what can only be described as empire building there are departments in my place of work where the director manages a head of department who manages a manager who manages the senior analyst who manages the analyst who manages the junior analyst!!!!! The poor bloody junior analyst is the one doing all the work and by the time they get the instruction of what to do they precisely 15 minutes to complete the task before the deadline set by the director and the instructions bear no resemblance to thee original ones. Mind you that doesn’t matter because invariably the director hasn’t a bloody clue what they asked for anyway they were just passing on the instructions from the overseas head office.

By: Mr Angry

Mr Angry — Sun, 30 Jul 2006 19:24:43 +0000

Hello Woody, Celeste and MAD.

There are some good titles there but I wonder if Woodys friend is male or female?

By: US

US — Sat, 29 Jul 2006 08:44:30 +0000

I suppose I’d be a mortality adjuster.

By: Four Dinners

Four Dinners — Sat, 29 Jul 2006 00:15:07 +0000

I’m a Cargo Agent. If my employer would agree to change Cargo to Secret I could get far more shags. They won’t though. bastards.

By: MAD

MAD — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 22:00:03 +0000

In Portugal the job title for those who work at a school cleaning or watching the children is “auxiliary of educational action”. It just sounds weird!

By: Marycub

Marycub — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 18:02:18 +0000

can’t really make sales assistant into anything else. does what it says on the job title.

By: ellie

ellie — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 15:31:30 +0000

I’m a marital interface exchange assistant.

And I’m a Ambisexual explorer.

And I’m an online information researcher and archivist.

And I’m not even paid for any of those activities. What do I get paid for? I don’t have a friggin’ clue.

By: Celeste

Celeste — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 14:52:32 +0000

Yeah, i worked for Abbey National a few years ago as a cashier although my job title was ‘Cash flow Operative’.

Lame.

By: Woody

Woody — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 13:56:48 +0000

You won’t believe this, but my friend’s legitimate business card says that he’s a “Tight Hole Stimulator” for “BJ Services”. I don’t know what he does, but it has a chance at being the best or worst job ever, depending on the hole of course.

By: Jorge

Jorge — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 12:51:55 +0000

My pet peeve is the word “Champion”

By: Oli

Oli — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 12:50:40 +0000

Dr Clip – My boss has seriously considered going for a ‘business card/ruler’ approach, finally make the damn things useful, looks like your joe bloggs could go for the same approach!

By: Dr J

Dr J — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 11:54:34 +0000

Angry, it’s really odd. For those born pre NHS “Quack” seems to be the preferred term, those after tend to go with “Doc” when you give them what they want (Antibiotics for everything and sick notes) or “That-was-a-total-waste-of-fuckin’-time-dunno-why-I-even-bovvered-commin’-Bastard!” when you don’t.

By: Scott

Scott — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 09:51:27 +0000

Angry – its very similar to a “Protein enriched beverage distributors assistant” yes, except I think he has a more twattish uniform and only half the sallery.
Technically I should have used the word hope instead of the word think I spose.
*slouches off back in to the bitter corner*

By: Mouldy

Mouldy — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 09:38:44 +0000

A certain institution I have heard of has someone called Head of Infrastructure.

What IS that?

By: Dr Clip

Dr Clip — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 09:16:30 +0000

this was announced in my company yesterday:

Joe Bloggs (made up name) Vice President, Marketing for (broad category) and (techy category) and Regional executive sponsor for (quality initiative A) and (quality initiative B)(Acting)

I think his business card is going to be A3 size.

By: BoyOnTop

BoyOnTop — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 09:03:17 +0000

Ah, the joys of title inflation. I usually have two or three which I bat about to confuse whomever I’m talking to. Its matters not a whit to me, its what I do that matters. I usually let my staff make up their own titles. If it makes them happy…

I came across a whopper of a title recently, “Brand Protection & Customer Care Officer/Director”. This was a person on not much money who sat and listened to contact centre calls and made notes. What happened to the notes I have not yet figured out.